Motivation

Are you born with motivation or is it something you can develop?

After several decades of observing, I don’t have conclusions, but maybe some insights that might help you with your motivation.  It’s a nature/nurture kind of question: Are you born with the maximum amount of personal energy that drives you to wake up early and get after each day or is it something that must be coaxed and coerced into life with various techniques of threats and rewards?

By my framing it as nature/nurture you already know that I think it’s both. We have a certain inherent disposition for energy that characterizes our personality, but we certainly aren’t fatally fixed at one level. We have choices if our natural state does not serve our long term interests. Granted it’s easier for some than others, but I strongly believe that everyone can be more consistent in the energy that runs through their minds, limbs, and lives. How to do that is the multi billion dollar industry question.

Keep in mind that, like you, I’m just a guy trying to figure things out. I’m no scholar. No preacher. No guru. Just a guy on the bus that has ebbs and flows in the consistency of my motivation. So these thoughts are puzzle pieces that when fit together offer me clues on how to read my own spirit. It seems prudent to begin with the idea that anything permanent must look at the whole of me – mind, body, and soul.

Puzzle pieces

Purpose: It’s the reason I act at all. I have purpose when I work out. It’s to feel good and project health. I want to lead my family by example in health. I diligently go to work because I don’t want to be mediocre (ego), don’t want to be in a negative position later in life (fear), and want to enjoy the benefits of money, power, and choice (freedom). I made a deal with God in my mid 30’s to lead in such a way to encourage positive growth in everyone I come in contact with and He would take care of my physical needs. Having a reason to push motivates me.

Workouts: I have never been able to work out fully by myself. So I’ve have worked out with friends, joined karate, hired a trainer, or set event goals (See Tough Mudder). Workouts give me momentum in other areas of my life. Committing to someone else that I’d show up motivates me.

Leadership: I am a hypocrite. I don’t want to be. So when I encourage people, I don’t want to be that doctor that smells like cigarette smoke or that financial planner that drives a 2005 Subaru. I want to be the thing I am leading: responsible, diligent, healthy, knowledgeable, caring, purposeful. Being able to present integrity to the world motivates me.

Resonate: The world affects me. When I see something that I think is cool, I get motivated for that thing. When I listen to certain kinds of music, I get energized. When I read things of quality, I get inspired. My mind then turns to my purpose and I ride the energy resonating from the source. Conversely, I am now more wise in the things affect me because I know that I can also be affected negatively. Nature and higher levels of humanity motivate me.

Fear: The concern that I will wake up one day and look back on what could have been and express regret at my actions as feeble, as prideful, as comfortable where I end up with a life short on choices. Fear has motivated me more than love in my earlier days. Love and purpose more so these days.

Events: I put things in my future to challenge me, inspire me, define me, and often to reward me. Travel, adventure, and uniqueness motivates me.

Bible: I have a natural tendency to relax. I know that if I relax too much, lots of bad things can happen. I find the Parable of the Talents instructive on four points: 1) You are given a certain capacity and must do with it what you can (faithful); 2) Slothful inactivity is an expression of fear; 3) There is opportunity cost in doing nothing (“I can even get interest”); and 4) Those that use their talents purposefully will be rewarded with more energy and those that don’t will lose what they have. Being in alignment with spiritual wisdom motivates me.

Habits: I have learned my tendencies. I know what affects me. New Year’s energizes me because it’s a fresh start. Springtime too. Mondays too. Friends energize me. Reading energizes me. Going to the right movies energizes me. I have learned that eating poorly sucks energy from me. Watching too much TV drains me. Focusing on the world’s problems saps my energy. On average, making good choices motivates me.

Feedback: I like praise. I enjoy it when someone says something nice about my effort. My wife’s praise is the number one motivator in my life though, weirdly enough, I don’t spring to action at every little request. I like positive engagement, but it’s not a top motivator. It’s more like the cherry on top of the others. But definitely, negative talk dispirits me.

Putting the pieces together

Nothing stands alone.  Every element of your life is a dynamic component with every other element of your life. Energize one area, it should energize other areas. Over time, you’ll arrive at a level of accomplishment worthy of your life. In your Ironmen group brainstorm the pieces of your puzzle:

1. Identify the things that energize you – people, music, reading, TED talks, seminars, church, material rewards, accolades, father approval, economic rewards, safety, adventure, etc.
2. Discuss how you can harness those elements into your plan. Start the day with prayer and meditation, watch a TED talk while eating breakfast, read a “How to” book before bedtime, workout with a friend, sign up for a marathon.
3. Ask your wife, girlfriend (hopefully not both), and Ironmen to hold you accountable to eating right, working out, reading regularly, watching less TV, going back to school.
4. Report back to your Ironmen group and wife how you’re doing. Energy will be high early, so prepare for the long haul. Consistency is everything!!!
5. Send me an email as to how this process is going for you. I’ll report your successful techniques so that everyone can benefit from your insights. You matter to me. You matter to others.

2018 is going to be a great year!!!  Get motivated!!!!!

To your continued success,

Dave Marr